Thursday, November 30, 2017

Intuition and Play Dates

When you pick a new friend for yourself, or arrange a play date for your child, the most important question seems to be, how do you feel intuitively about that person?

I seldom organized play dates for my children, because my own mother’s choices were hit or miss. She scored with Dee, who’s been in my life since we were two. She sort of missed as I entered middle school, when my three pals played games that sometimes left me out of the action. When it snowed, each of them had a snowmobile. I didn’t. Sometimes in the summer, I’d find out and feel terrible when they got together without me.

When my children were small, a mother would invite my son or daughter to hang out with her child. Sometimes, the mother and I didn’t get along, or my child and her child didn’t hit it off. With every failure, I thought about intuition. 

We think we know instinctively what works, but without a try, we can’t always know. I made the choice to let my children make their own friends. That too had perils, but those choices, along with acceptance and rejection, helped them learn to love.

In life, it’s surprising how we can randomly meet someone and feel an immediate, strong connection. Then another day, experience a giant burst of laughter with one stranger, and a huge sense of calm while in close proximity with another. Our awareness of these unseen connections astounds us, and surprises us, and makes us believe in things that can’t be proven. 

For all this, let us give thanks.